YThursday, February 16, 2006
i was lonely and searching..and trust me, i still am. but im not sad..neither am i ecstatic.
but im half full in a cup..no longer half empty.
so come and hurt me and despise me..give me all those criticisms and maddening remarks..i dun give a damn. ur just gona be like everybody else..dissing and criticizing..without lookin at urself in the mirror.
being independent and numb is really all it takes..
experiences taught me not to follow my hurt and ignore matters of the heart. im on my own..but it doesnt make me weak. it makes me wiser and in time..i know i'll be complete..i'll meet that person..
when the time comes..i know i'l be greater than ecstatic..cuz i wun be a cup half full..*wink*
i spent loads of time alone searching for myself..figurin out what i wana do in life..questioning myself..
what do i really want out of all this?
i still havent figure it out..and im gona spend every moment in solitude tryin to do so..theres however only one thing im sure of..
to make my loved ones happy.to complete them the way i long to be completed..
and noo...i dun wana end up bein a spinster..haha
im just puttin the thougths of relationships at the back of my head..for now.
yesterday, i sat lookin..at the sight of the people around me.. i was amazed by the kaleidoscopic image..the many mixtures and blends of characters and personalities..i never realised how beautiful life is..how the Lord actually is an Almighty..how great is the work of the Creator. overwhlemed by the happiness of others and saddened by the fact that i've only realised life's true beauty now..
its never too late i guess..heh..as long as im alive..it's all good. =)
dun be depressed..and live life in misery..ur never truly lonely..unless if u choose to.
stop thinking that u serve no purpose in this life cuz u'll never realise wat big tasks u were meant to hold.. there is nothing wrong in sharing other's happiness and its not a sin to be happy wen others are not..u dun need someone to make u happy..wat makes u think that someone else would wana be wit u wen ur that sad of a case?
trust me..i know. being lonely is sick and it hurt. but its worst of when ur lonely, sad AND depressed..think abt it.
btw guys...smile! its ok if it makes u look a lil retarded..
its the first step to a beautiful day... =D
*smiling*
Lord Bless
_callous_ was here with you at
